2014考研英语写作160篇:堵车现象(考生作文批改及评分)_跨考网
写作原文
As is indicated in the cartoon above,a big crowded of drivers stay in cars on the road,waiting for their turn to go,with patience almost running up(表达不准确且句子缺成分,根据图片可改为and even some people want to hold the car to go out of the long queue).In fact ,nowadays,this phenomenon reflected by the picture is so widespread,especially in super(super改为big,super表示“超级”,用在此处不合适)cities.Thanks to the fast development of economy,we have a chance to experience the more(去掉the more,rich为单音节形容词,其比较级直接在后面加-er即可) richer life.As a result of that,(第一句用thanks to表示原因,第二句用as a result of that也表示原因,这样有点繁琐,建议将两句话合为一句话,可改为and)the number of people who own cars is larger and larger.The once wide roads become narrow (汉语式英语,可改为The wide roads before become narrow now).In order to get to destination(改为destinations,每个人的目的地不一样,应用复数形式)on time,people have to set up (改为set out,set up意为“建立,创立”;set out为“出发”,注意短语的正确选择) earlier in case of being blocked.By the way ,discharging too much carbon-dioxide to the air would(改为will) destroy the environment.Therefore,it is imperative for us to take measures to change the fact.The simplest method is to diminish the times(改为time,time在表示“时间”时,为不可数名词,当“次数”讲时为可数名词) of using private transportations.There is no doubt the world would change into a better place for us to live benefited from all the efforts we devote.(汉语式英语,可改为There is no doubt that the world will be better for us to live in as long as all of us devote our efforts.)
总体点评
文章中存在一些细节问题,比如词汇的选择和一些基础的语法知识。作者在写作完之后若可以花费几分钟时间来回读文章,便会减少此类问题,从而避免失分。同时,建议结合《写作160篇》的指导,认真复习,积累经典句型,避免汉语式英语的表达,不断提高自己的写作水平。加油吧,祝你考研成功!
参考分数(满分20分):11
2022考研初复试已经接近尾声,考研学子全面进入2023届备考,跨考为23考研的考生准备了10大课包全程准备、全年复习备考计划、目标院校专业辅导、全真复试模拟练习和全程针对性指导;2023考研的小伙伴针也已经开始择校和复习了,跨考考研畅学5.0版本全新升级,无论你在校在家都可以更自如的完成你的考研复习,暑假集训营带来了院校专业初步选择,明确方向;考研备考全年规划,核心知识点入门;个性化制定备考方案,助你赢在起跑线,早出发一点离成功就更近一点!
考研院校专业选择和考研复习计划 | |||
2023备考学习 | 2023线上线下随时学习 | 34所自划线院校考研复试分数线汇总 | |
2022考研复试最全信息整理 | 全国各招生院校考研复试分数线汇总 | ||
2023全日制封闭训练 | 全国各招生院校考研调剂信息汇总 | ||
2023考研先知 | 考研考试科目有哪些? | 如何正确看待考研分数线? | |
不同院校相同专业如何选择更适合自己的 | 从就业说考研如何择专业? | ||
手把手教你如何选专业? | 高校研究生教育各学科门类排行榜 |
相关推荐
跨考考研课程
班型 | 定向班型 | 开班时间 | 高定班 | 标准班 | 课程介绍 | 咨询 |
秋季集训 | 冲刺班 | 9.10-12.20 | 168000 | 24800起 | 小班面授+专业课1对1+专业课定向辅导+协议加强课程(高定班)+专属规划答疑(高定班)+精细化答疑+复试资源(高定班)+复试课包(高定班)+复试指导(高定班)+复试班主任1v1服务(高定班)+复试面授密训(高定班)+复试1v1(高定班) | |
2023集训畅学 | 非定向(政英班/数政英班) | 每月20日 | 22800起(协议班) | 13800起 | 先行阶在线课程+基础阶在线课程+强化阶在线课程+真题阶在线课程+冲刺阶在线课程+专业课针对性一对一课程+班主任全程督学服务+全程规划体系+全程测试体系+全程精细化答疑+择校择专业能力定位体系+全年关键环节指导体系+初试加强课+初试专属服务+复试全科标准班服务 |